Lights Out

A very personal poem I wrote about a very personal situation. 

This feels like the kind

Of dark, warm night

When you'd leave us

Forever.

This feels like about the time

You'd start crying

Begging, pleading,

Swearing you've had enough.

I've seen you cry

I've seen you angry

I've seen you point fingers

At everyone else.

And so this feels like the kind of moment

You'd start blaming us

Again,

Like always.

This feels like the kind of disaster

That would finally make you give up

And you would finally leave us,

Forever.

This feels like the kind of weather,

With our broken, unkept, and unlit house,

When you would hate us

Forever.

So yes, this feels like the kind of

Calm, unforgiving night

When you'd point a gun at your head

And leave us, forever.

The Train

Frozen fingers and frozen toes,

Frozen eyes with somewhere to be.

Foggy windows gently kissed by gently falling rain,

Creating a presence in a fallen city,

A long-forgotten grandeur.

Packed into cars, hovering above and looking down,

Measuring yards and counting row-houses

As though the view above gave us control,

Could possibly help us understand.

Soon it became routine.

The hum-buzz grinding of the metal hitting the tracks,

The same disapproving faces of a race in constant motion.

Just a matter of putting on my face and getting it done.

It was a sight of something different,

Opposite of everything I had ever known.

The truth I witnessed every day

Left me amazed and slightly dizzy.

So with frozen fingers and frozen toes,

These frozen eyes venture forth.

Coming down from my high bearings,

Perhaps the city creates a presence within me.

Living Anomoly

A little poetry to hold you off until I finish Chapter 10 of Historical Tervik.

City lights and skyscrapers,

Brighter than the stars of Canis Major.

Fingers that touched the skies,

And hopes disguised.

Will I ever stand on roof tops

Taller than bordered up corner stop and shops?

Or will I always be a dreamer,

A good story, big hope believer.

Who knows? My days could be numbered

Shorter than a single night's slumber.

And my nails don't grow long

enough to prove my bad habits wrong.

Coupon clipping

And penny pinching

Certainly has merit

When you're on a cheap food, ramen noodle diet.

Just like deep thinking

And break-time dreaming,

Keeps you searching for

Days you're not piss poor.

Royalty, oh royalty,

Oh privileged youth please see me,

On your doorstep,

I'm a living anomaly.

I see better behind my glasses

Than those privileged rich-born asses.

I hear more with my damaged ears,

I live their very darkest fears.

They say when it rains, it pours.

Grey clouds certainly are a force,

In my mind and yet my heart?

Lucky to say it's never been torn apart.

Lucky to say you're all still alive,

Lucky to say I've got the will to strive,

Just so goddamn lucky.